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More than Enough

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More than enough

by the lovely songwriter from the band, Elizabeth and the Catapult.

Once in awhile

More often than naught

I forget that I forgot

That I got what I got

For a good reason

Though it may not be much

It’s more than enough

Once in awhile

I relax in my seat

I forget what is missing

I kiss fear on the cheek

I feel the light on my back

Though it burns with regret

It’s more than enough

So remember on this mid-week day…. you’ve got a lot to be thankful for…. even if you don’t have all the answers. 🙂

~lme

Come in, the water’s nice

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Photo Courtesy:  This flickr photostream

Standing high above a precipice am I.  And the people below are chanting and calling my name- Jump, Jump they say.  A nagging feeling tugs at me like a string in my back attached to the oak tree a few feet behind me.  The string is saying no and my toes curl under with every sound uttered from their lips.  A rush of fear consumes my body as I peer over the edge at the water below.  But they look like they are having so much fun, bobbing buoys saying come on in… the water’s nice.  If I can just leap once, and then the free fall where there will be no turning back.  The only thing left at that point will be to anticipate the splash.  The submerge.  Of first the feet, and then the water as it climbs up my legs and tickles my abdomen, and the water climbs up to my neck and head and envelops every hair bursting from my scalp as the water overtakes me.  I did it.  I jumped.  When i float back to the surface and resurrect from the watery grave, there they are.  All their smiling, encouraging faces knowing i had one last act of bravery within my body.  We dog paddle around the lagoon with legs and arms in the cool clean water.  The drops of water roll off my arms back to whence it came.  One jump inspires another and another.  I can jump again.  The joy lies just beyond the fear.  Fear pulsating in my ears like a deafening voice can be quieted with just one calm step.  Jump they say.  Jump. Jump.  i wasn’t ready for the plunge.  But in that moment between terror and reckless abandon was a split second of sheer bravery.  So I seized it and ran.

Oh great….. another Valentine’s post

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Photo Courtesy:  British Library photostream

Ok guys, give me a chance…. i hope this one will actually be more substantial than ways to know if you’re “in the right relationship” or “how to find your soulmate” or whatever other interesting read is out there.  I just have several things on my mind as this blessed holiday of love approaches us once again.  And thanks to my dear friend, Lauren, for sparking some thoughts through some great conversation 🙂

1.  Love has been sadly misconstrued in the American culture.  Love in the Bible does not look like what I see around me.  Materialism doesn’t seem to really be a part of biblical love.  Selfishness is not a part of it.  Pride is not a part of it.  And part of me doubts that we really want to actually “love” someone anymore, because frankly that’s just too hard.  It isn’t about candy hearts and sweet words when it all boils down to the bottom.  Love, true love, is wanting what is best for someone else even if that means I suffer.  It means giving of resources without always thinking how this is going to hurt or help me.  Let’s be honest people, 50/50 is not even a legitimate goal in any friendship or relationship.  So let’s just drop that expectation at the door.  Love is active service.  Love is sitting in a hospital room when there are other things you’d rather be doing.  Love is going the extra mile.  Love is giving even when it hurts.  Love is sharing.  Love is listening.  Love is pulling yourself along on the days when you feel you literally have nothing left to give.  Love is trying to think no evil even when there is anger deep inside that would much rather lash out.  Love requires a lifetime of work and will still leave us with more we can do.

2.  “Your actions speak so loudly, that I cannot hear your words.”  This quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson has resonated with me every time i’ve read it in my life.  Sometimes when we look at ourselves and others, we tend to see discrepancies in action and deed.  It’s like we say things, but there isn’t anything to prove it.  Jesus tells us in John, “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.”  This tells me that love isn’t gushy sweet things or love poems or happiness all the time.  It’s action.  It requires dedication.  It will require is to grow and hurt and laugh and cry, but it will make us better.  And this quote shows me that what we do can be infinitely more important than what we say or what we say we’re going to do.

3.  Love is a choice and a difficult one more often than not.  It’s not easy to walk through the fire knowing you could be burned.  It’s not easy to give to people who are thankless.  It isn’t easy to hope that someone will strive for greatness and do a 180 degree turn.  But we are called to love our neighbor as ourselves.  Knowing the sacrifices and the blessing that God has given us will help soften our hearts toward those who have wronged us and toward those we don’t “feel” like loving at times.  To spend and be spent is the idea of real love.  Support, encouragement and a willing heart will go farther in working toward a goal than a continuous negativity that sees the worst in every situation.  We cannot keep repeating the past and hope that the future will be brighter.  We must change.  We must be willing to stretch our hearts and our arms toward those who at times make loving really difficult.  I think i understand that at times.  Christ came to die for those of us who sometimes turn away from Him.  How hard it would have been to still have compassion on a people who really didn’t want you to even live.  He didn’t shake people and scream at them.  He just quietly strove to love them and give Himself for them.

I hope these thoughts can encourage and give you some positive meditation tomorrow on a holiday that has warped our concept of love.  Happy valentine’s day kiddos 🙂

~lme

the babe of creativity

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Photo Courtesy:  Florida Memory flickr photostream

A respite.  A haven.  Away from the problems and frustrations of this world.  At the edge of the ivory or near the window of a train.  An escape from the mundane.  To need this is to tap into vulnerability.  To long for this is not distant from divine.  To stand up for this is to speak for something that cannot speak of its own.  Your creativity needs you.  The quiet part of you that longs to be in touch with the Maker.  There is something deep within that says “come here, and see.”  run your fingers in this sand, feel the velvet against your skin, breathe in the salty sea air, pull your knees tighter into your chest…. and sink like a cannonball into your own restlessness.  May i find a forest.  Lead me into the ocean.  My heart longs for all of these majestic pictures of nature, with strings playing behind me as the waves crash against the new england rocks, jagged and fierce.  Do not ignore that voice that says, come sit awhile and make something grand, make your mark on this earth.  Employ thy hands and mind to paint, sculpt, sing, laugh, connect, hug and inspire those who need lifting up.  come show us how to imagine they say.  Come give us hope for we lost it today.

listen, create and share

~lme

How to steal power from the so-called cool kids

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Photo Courtesy:  Library of Congress photostream

Reading in Galatians, I happened upon the verse in chapter 4, verse 17

“They zealously court you, but for no good; yes, they want to exclude you, that you may be zealous for them.”  Paul talks about how the people who had something over the others in the churches of Galatia would use their selectivity as a cause to gain more prominence.

Isn’t that so true?  The people who think they are supposedly cool only have power because they are in some form of elitist club?  Why on earth would we sell high dollar VIP passes to events or membership into selective golf clubs around the world?  We all want to belong to a group and we want to be super special.  More special than the next guy right?  So how can you steal power from the cool kids, self-deemed?

  1. Take a long hard look at them and know the only reason they have power is because we give it to them.  Power must be given.  And if you unravel them in your mind by affirming that you belong here just as much as they do, you will begin to realize the strength in what you have.
  2. Don’t make it your goal to be in their club.  Instead, strive to be the most true to yourself and who you are, fostering your talents and giving back to the Maker who gave to you.  Why try to grab a bar that you didn’t set for yourself?
  3. Cool is only a word made up by someone to make us think people have it all together.  They don’t.  In fact, the people that seem to be so put together perhaps have more to hide.  And cool and weird and odd all designate a sense of other when really we are so very similar.  If only we looked at our similarities we might begin to see the unity that could be.
  4. If you should get welcomed into a group of these so- called popular kids, remember to continually take stock of who you are and examine whether you are doing things because you want to do them or because the mob mentality deems it so.  And don’t be afraid to stand for what is right even if everyone ridicules you for it or calls you weird.  You aren’t alone. Ever.

Take that cool kids.

~lme

And a song that goes along with this from Echo Smith can be heard here…. Click on music and Cool Kids is the song 🙂

Open mind and heart

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Photo Courtesy: This flickr stream

Some things I’ve realized about the idea of having an open mind and heart and what I personally think it really means.

  1. An open mind is one that is willing to study and think and not think it knows the all the answers.
  2. An open mind is one that doesn’t point fingers and tell everyone how judgmental they are.
  3. An open mind is willing to show the same respect and care to others who disagree from their views as those who see eye to eye with them.
  4. An open heart means not only giving of ourselves and of our means to those we enjoy but also the difficult, the unruly, those who seem to be different, odd or drain us of our energy.
  5. An open heart will try its best to not slap labels instantly on a person, groups of people or try to state the situation of hearts until fruit has become evidence of worthy or unworthy conduct.
  6. An open heart doesn’t seek to ostracize but seeks to mend, to unify and to pursue peace.

Water and erosion

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Waves upon waves

of searing, new folds of pain

eroding what I knew

Day after day

Why will you keep haunting me

As if you don’t desire me to recover

How will I heal

If I’m not left alone

My bleeding little fingers

Gripping the Rock

While the damp air whips

My hair about my cheeks and ears

And satan whispers

He is no longer here

Lies are in your chest

Lies are what you do best

I know this is just a test

I would not say I’m brave

You said you’d never leave

So perhaps I can hold on

For just one more day

~lme

In the Future…

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Photo Courtesy: Florida photostream

Where do I see myself in the future?

I see myself in a cottage by the ocean, where the waves are lapping up against huge rocks and the sun is setting.  I can hear sea gulls having a conversation about the weather or the latest thing they read.  I’m swallowed by a sweater that’s entirely too big for me and my feet are tucked up beneath me in my Adirondack chair painted seafoam green.  I am touching a journal with hundreds of empty pages just awaiting to be dressed in lyrics, poems, stories and imaginings of my mind.  It’s quiet by the ocean.  It’s peaceful by the ocean.  And the night air closing in is pushed by the wind, encouraging her to be better and stronger than she was before.  The horizon provides the center, the balance, the anchor for my eyes.  My formerly brushed hair is now lifted off my neck by the wind and brought around my eyes and caressing my cheek and with each breath, I take in more healing, salty, sea air.  I think I begin to understand why the doctors at the turn of the century recommended a stay near the beach for its healing properties.  I lie back, close my eyes and just be.

~lme

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Photo Courtesy: This flickr photostream

A lonely cabin perched upon the side of a hill suddenly illumined by the light of morning with rays dancing against the imperfect and raw wood siding of the house is etched in pages of my mind.  It was only a house, and the life, the home, the heart was inside.  Simplicity garnered felicity in my surroundings.  The windows allowed the light in as a welcome guest with curtains of sheer cream that blew effortlessly in the summertime.  There were but three rooms; a bathroom, a bedroom and an open community room with a stove, a loveseat and a handmade wooden table with four chairs nestled around.  Within the corner of the community room sat my favorite piece of all.  It was a writing desk full of ideas, sketchings, dried flowers, bottles with sand from all over the world, a wren feather, and pens for me to craft my favorite places on earth and other worlds.  I was never so happy as running free and wild in my imagination where no harm could befall me unless I allowed it to be so.  The most glorious time of day was just before sunset when the world felt warmer with the sun bestowing a blessing of orange, yellow and red in rays upon the grass, the sod roof of the cabin and the garden resting up for it’s debut in spring.  The anticipation of the changing seasons and the simple pleasures of a life lived were enough to make me gratefully content.  Mealtime was something to be treasured in both the preparation and the crafting of dishes with hands that had long worked to gather the vegetables, knead the dough and lovingly set the table.  Evenings at the cabin were spent in simplicity, reading by the fire, taking a moonlight walk in the woods or telling stories composed of memory or make-believe.  Maybe it was the stark, eggshell walls with few pictures hung.  Or maybe it was the way the wind whistled through the leaves in the live oak fifty feet from the front door.  Perhaps it was promise of adventure in the woods not far down the hill that held a sense of mystery and wonder for me.  But something about that little cabin in the woods was bathed in comfort, felt strongly of acceptance and possessed a spirit so in line with mine that I returned year after year.

~lme

Thoughts I’m thinking- take them or leave them

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Photo Courtesy:  Smithsonian photostream

You can only control you.  Spending your lifetime being frustrated that others aren’t doing what you want or what you believe they should be doing is a waste of time.  Trying to discern and know the hearts of those around you can’t be wholly known.  By your fruits you will know them, but ultimately it can be a release to know it is not your ballgame to referee.

As much as you’d like to think you’re in control, I know you’ll admit that you are completely helpless and powerless at times.  I think when I’m most discouraged is when I feel helpless, as if there is nothing that I physically can do to change a situation.  Sometimes there is not a thing I can do.  There is Someone who can though.

Do we all have a misconception of perfection and when something doesn’t align, we’d rather just toss it than try to fix it?  We are a throw-away generation.  We have this luxury of doing that with almost anything and everything from plastic bottles   and beyond.

Because we are able to eat fast food, fast meals and have the world at our fingertips, are we growing less capable of possessing patience.  Instead of waiting and watching and cultivating a garden, we choke things out by “too much watering, too fast.”  Why not take the time to think of a project, a challenge or something you hope to achieve that you know will take longer than a month.

There is only so much of an energy reserve in your body and mind.  Some days it gets used up rather quickly.  Other days you are able to prolong it.  Some weeks drain you emotionally while others will fill your cup.  Sometimes the knowledge and continual presence of social media can really tend to exhaust your soul.  Limiting it can be a healthy thing to do at points.  I like to think about a time when the only people you would know lived on the surrounding farms, but your information was much more limited.  I actually think that was probably pretty healthy since you weren’t continually and unnecessarily concerned with the affairs of everyone outside your sphere.  We carry the weight of the world on us knowing the pains and problems of all those around us and beyond.  It can seem overwhelming at times I know.

Something positive to end this post is what I need.  It doesn’t matter how many facebook friends you have if you have five people you can count on in an emergency to be there for you.  It doesn’t matter how flawed and broken you are, the perfect Son has already done amazing things to make you whole.  If you try your whole life and achieve your own goals and no one notices, cares or compliments your bravery, talent or perseverance, God cares.  He’s cheering you on in the final stretches where you’re taking off in a sprint for what you have been working so hard.  He’s sitting next to you.  He’s listening to you when you feel desperately alone.  He’s listening to me when I’m wondering how I will take another step in the right direction.  Whether you’re in an elevator, a car driving home, a doctors office awaiting news or an open field with a world of stars above your head reminding you how small you really are, He is there.  In the words of the letter He left us, you can hear His voice.  And even when the world begins to be washed in grey from the monotony of life, He is there.  Always there.  In the confusion.  There.  In the questions.  There.  In the Answers.  There.  When the storm won’t seem to let up even for a minute.  There.

Take heart my brother.

~lme